The Ugly

Cheat meal turned into cheat day. Horrible hormonal day - no sleep, no control. Had Joe chasing me because I was eating something bad every 5 mins. I cried while licking a spoonful of peanut butter. I found cookies he purposely hid from me and ripped open the bag and had two! He tried to stop me but every chance I got I went crazy. He saw the ugly side of my lack of control. I thought about locking myself in the bathroom w all the junk and he can no longer take them from me. He ended up throwing away what he could (unless I ate it all). I blame it on the no sleep and work stress. I say with 7 weeks out I can't be pulling that shit anymore. I am craving bad stuff and the case of the "fuck its" are trying to peak through. I'm battling with it - trying to ignore it. I don't know what happened. Killer Mood swings. I see-saw between motivation and resignation.